TCMC 25 March 2010 Part 1
station practice is going extremely well and starting to pay off in any other ways and and your life. And I'd really be happy to hear from you any comments or questions about your practice. Yes. Well, I was wondering if I could ask a question about sort of applying practice. Mh. I don't wanna ask you about what I do with the situation in my life, but how I can use my practice and sort of work through it. Mh. I'm thinking about buying a house i've never bought a house. I found a house outside lab And I'm doing all the things that I should do about that situation.
What I'd noticed is going on with me is an extraordinary amount of craving, and whole lot of fear. Yes. Yes. And I noticed that I can be depress with the crave and present it with the fear. I can kind of be okay with it. But I can't stop it. I idea that it would be a lot easier to make a decision. If I could create more space and yet more space is not happening. What I noticed is just a lot of craving. I want them one month they on. But also a lot of fear and I wanted I don't want fear. So I could, you know, so go version really.
Yeah. So how does wanna make an important decision with so much emotional stuff going on. That feels like it's cloud it's cloud things. Yeah. No doubt. It is. I that's sure absolutely every single person in the room. Knows exactly what you're talking about and what you're going to? Yeah. Like our emotions cloud things. And especially when we have emotions that conflicts with each other. And mean, if you had all we had your craving, you know, then you you wouldn't be getting caught up in the fear with.
Know, the preview. This is what I want. It's perfect for me, you know, I can have a... The type have other part, you know, but a completely different agenda says, oh, no. But what if this is mistake, maybe you're any more you should for it, maybe you won't be able to make their payments. With the windfall I'm not an expert on these things. Maybe this all sorts of problems so Well well, first with those, there are, you know, your rational line can tell you about there's things that I can do people I can see things that I can include in the in in the deal the sucks.
So it's the emotions it's not to what to do about it. Right. People about Oh, great. I am doing everything I should. I doing the stuff and yet all of, ultimately, It's not just a logical decision. It's not just, yes I should no. I shouldn't it's you know, what's best for me and will I is and to am i and what will my life be like and you know, it might me a great house but one other person, but maybe not for me. So it's Yeah. It's not just a logical decision. And then all this emotional stuff is kinda...
Yeah. Well it's there. And so you have to accept where i say. Yeah. And to the degree that you find a version to spasms coming out. Eighty to you need to try as much as possible so let go with that. Versions. But, of course. You can't make the fear grow away, You can't make the craving go away. You can't actually make the version to the fear breathing go away. Well what you can do is try to create that space. Between the existential eu and these experiences by not identifying as much as as much as you can.
So you try not to identify with the version to the fear and try to accept this year. And then you try to not to identify with the fear, but to examine it mindful employee and see It is it's quite right, how it rises and and how it passes in way our drive of spot process it because I'm sure you've noticed this that emotion like feared will drive certain pattern thought processes. And once they get started and really hard to stop. And as long as they keep going, they keep to fear. And and so you need to...
The same way you do in meditation when you have a lot of intriguing thoughts is that you try to let them be there, but keep your focus where it's supposed to be you find something else to focus on. And so that's what you really need to do is to keep your focus where it belongs rather than getting into those thoughts and getting into feelings and, you know, getting lost in on ten of the slides. And identifying what the feed. So and there's different situations depending on what you're what you're doing.
The hardest one is usually and you can tell me if this is a case with you is when you're lying in bed at night, because it's not a whole lot else to focus your attention on and these thoughts start out on they students not. So, I think that my practice has working remarkably well. Mh. Based on that I haven't been having trouble sleeping. Having that's like other my like, I certainly had been trouble sleeping when I big decisions. So I feel like I'm not I am extremely much less detached. Wonderful Then previous.
I won't say I'm not attached, but I am much more effective. Than ever more than I can think of. And noticing I'm experiencing something. And that what's going on is I'm experiencing something and that it doesn't really mean anything. At least not that I can tell. So fear happening? Yes. Craving is happening. Yes. And it's happening and happening happening. And you don't have to do anything your... Yeah. And and I... So I I am be able to see that I am not afraid because there's something wrong with me, which is what I had previously thought, nor am I thinking, I have to buy this house because I really want it.
So I made by am in that some sense, but white detached at least the comparison to how I have been previously. So I have some space get it. It does seem to me that the more space I have, be more pleasant Or less unpleasant, this experience will be. And the to some degree, I will be likely to make a better decision. Doesn't mean i to make the best possible decision but a better decision. More likely be later decision. So I'm want as much space if I can get. Yes. Definitely. Very good. Yeah. That is what you want.
Certainly. Let's talk about how you can make that space. Stay is fully present as you can. In every moment. Because, obviously, all of all of the stuff of the craving in the fear. Have to do it the future. Maybe somebody who has to do the past, mostly the future that definitely doesn't have to do this present. Just be in the present. And I find that the best antidote to to the thought process go, is body. Just get into your bodily sensations out. And be in the present every other blade that you can remind yourself to be aware of sounds.
Be aware of the the the temperature sensations in your body. You know, parts of your body you're exposed to the year and in different temperature foundations. Parts of your body that are cloth or are in contact with other parts to your body and so forth. That's a we're getting into the present Whether you're sitting and sending, how comfortable how comfortable do you feel and As you're doing things, putting your awareness into emotions and stepping, sitting down standing out, reaching or grasping something, drinking eating, sort of for just be in the present as much as you can and that helps enormously today to create some distance there.
And it really is the being in the present is is the best thing that you can do when your face where thoughts that are not adopted. And you can acknowledge the feelings that present here and all those the thoughts that are going on. But You don't. You don't have to get caught a pin them. You can say, oh there I am worrying about, you know, your examples what the comes. Think there's the worry about what if the root was something else that, you know, that's happening in presently awareness if that thought is going on in the present.
But you don't have to be a caught on then. He can be rarely and let it go. You can you can move on to other thoughts that are more appropriate at the time. So that old the whole secret of it is realizing that Everything that's happening in your mind has been set in motion But our past process and conditions by the structure of your brain by the conditioning of your mind. And at some level, get all make sense so they would be happening. You're you're taking a big step. So it makes sense that it would be some interference?
So... But as you said, it doesn't mean you have to do anything about it. Just recognize it is there. And at the same time, proceed as reasonably as she's possibly can't. And when you find the emotion starting you take it the better of you, get back in be getting you the present by using your bog leaf sensations sounds, what you're seeing. It will somebody be fully present. For what's happening between you and that person, what sense said. Because it sounds like you're already... You you erase this hence obviously, you have so much of this awareness already.
That's wonderful. And by your own account your handling it so much more gracefully than you have an past. So and congratulations on all of those accounts And congratulations on having an. Perhaps for perhaps yeah. Well, let's see. How would say your. Never be attached to code. All you can do is do what you can and don't be attached it turning out way. So how how about the rest of it? Well, I know what presents. All of you with different challenges. Presumably, you're all dealing with Very effectively he's.
During your day practice interior your life. Anybody have any comments or questions about Giving that daily practice is going? And I I noticed two congress here. So please feel free to ask any questions so you have... You're really welcome. Yes. I'm around to youtube two manager. Without naming some room from those thoughts. What we want to make the space the room from the five. But what we find is it trying to suppress them just is is not very good way. That they that that Eventually, they will fall away martin sounds.
But initially, we have to expect that they're going to be there and not try to suppress them and not try to them because that's not going to work. Instead, we start yeah, very centrally and as a matter of how getting the entire process. We take it by individual simple steps. Each one in itself is not making and a recently large chunks. So what we noticed when we sit down the Meditate is that It's a very strong tendency for us to forget that that's what we do like. And to get caught in fog or another.
Right? And we say that that there... Did that happens to say everyone. It happens very often. And so we start there and making it our objective and what we try to work for is is is is getting to place where we'd never forget what we're doing. Okay. But we noticed that what happens there is first we, forget what we're doing. If we allow ourselves to be distracted by a thought. If it's only a very short period of time, we don't figure forget what we're doing and then we'll go back to meditate. But if it's a little bit too long, then we'll forget what it was we we're doing.
And so even when we're done with that thought, then the module will go on to something else. And then there's something else, and then is something else. So First, the forgetting happens because we got distracted that led that beginning then the forgetting leads to the mind laundering. And then eventually the mine one leads to that. A aha moment went. This isn't what I was supposed to be here. Right. And so what we do is instead of trying to to control the mind in ways that we're not ready to do.
We'll say, well, first of all, what I need to do is to to be able to go as long as I can without forgetting what the is that I'm doing. And at the same time, considering that it's inevitable that I am forget right. To try to to realize more quickly so that less of my time isn't wasted in Lean thoughts got all kinds of inc things. I necessarily we focus on that. Begin, right. And after a period of time and practicing in that way, we'll find that the the mind wandering doesn't occur nearly this much.
The forgetting may not happen as often. But when it does, it doesn't lead to the long period in mine. Okay? So then we just keep working in that direction until we never forget what it is where we're that we're done. And then at some point, we will try to... When we don't forget what we're doing and it will be throughout the whole time that we're saying, we never figure out what we're doing. Then we'll try to refine it a little bit. Now we'll try to keep our notation i'll object and the focus of our attention while all this other stuff is going, and we're not going to stop it.
And this is where it starts really wonderful. Because if you can, if you can keep your mind focus on your meditation object, you're allowing that other stuff to be there. You're aware of it. What this is doing is it's allowing you to look at your mind in a way that you never have before. And how you can start to see why your mind this behaved and that way that caused you to forget what you're doing get get lost in a hard water. As your understanding of your own mind improves then your ability to deal with this problems.
Corresponding. And then the next step beyond that is once you're able to stay with one thing or is the central focus in your mind and succeed in ignoring everything else. A lot of that everything else just starts to follow right. So the thoughts become less frequent. They they had west's ability to draw your attention anyway. And you start doing more and more at to in the direction and internal call and internal piece. But it's a kind that is not dull. It's not sleepy. It's not chance like. It's you're totally alert and you're totally awake and you're unaware in the state of call.
Clear awareness. And in this whole process as it's been taking place, you've been able to observe your mind and you trying understand yourself much more deeply. So so... Yes. I don't know if I'm not sure if you ask a question. Not sure if you did if I answered it. Okay. Thank you. I'm glad to hear that then. And so Are you using the the sensations of the breakfast and meditation and object? Andrea How their both? So but basically, you're you you're you're using as as the meditation object that you always return to is, but sensations out of the drug.
Yeah. That was very good. Okay. Wonderful. This Yes ma'am. That. Serve your mind. Mh. You notice just notes that are passed through. But you're not being about the. No. You're... As as much as possible, you're just letting them come to go on their own, you know, that in in much the same way, you know, if you're if you're in particular activity, other people tell them they're own rent when you a level of web. They're they're passing through to distract you. Or if you're having your conversation and with a friend in a sidewalk cafe faith, you know, you don't know allow the buses in the car passing already distracting you know they're there.
You know, but they're they're not not your focused. Being there are a few occasions when we can go beyond that and it's helpful. Sometimes it's helpful to use a a a labeling technique. There's certain kinds of thoughts. That it it's helpful to label them when strong... With sudden when the same thoughts come through and strongly, distracting and they and they keep recurring over over can. Then then sometimes you can look at them more closely to investigate them to not getting caught out in them and not launching into some completely different kind of analytical process, you know, about them.
It is to think to think about a thought is to get lost identify whereas to be aware of it to observe it to label it to see its nature to have the kind of recognition at all the the same thing that has been coming up over over again. These can all happen without getting lost and a sort of dis person, you know, analysis. Okay. Well, thanks for good Questions. It's it's time now for us oh. Could you do me a great favor nancy? That is nine dollar prayer.