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Stronghold 26 June 2011


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then you might have anything that feel like talking about? What is the idea mister is right mystery. Like, there's so many traditions that kind of at the core of the mystical experience is this idea of mystery yet buddhism so often it seems more it's like illumination than mystery. Yet. A lot of the things that I've stumbled on seem to have this very mysterious you for them me know. So I wonder if you just heard anything to say on that. Well, I I don't think there's as much difference as it may appears.

Good and the mystery gets. She say, oh, wow Look at them the street. I I think the the essence the mystery and any tradition is the fact that at a certain point, you realize that that truth reality for time being used spread, is beyond the the reach of the human mind to grasp. I him, comprehend. Describe and know him the sense of him any sense that be ordinary let me know. So In every tradition, there's always this attempt to try to provide descriptions. But I'll finish up by saying, but it's an mystery.

Mystery is embedded in certain paradox paradoxes that arise. And the fact that things are paired, is there infection. Of the way lines work our minds can all. You know, the the the the logic of the the mind that it only allows certain still least and what doesn't fit into that? It appears as paradox, us. It's it's the human bind that makes a paradox. And so that's... Where I think picking out security. What could be more mysterious? Sessions? Which is widely these terms like anti antennas us to try to describe that.

But there is one difference. I think that. Buddhism seven is very rational. As a huge amount of logic. It's very systematic it. And actually, I would style it as scientific. You know, I the long proceeded the development. To paradigm way and thinking that we call science and rest, but it shares all the same basic. Features of it, you know, kinda it's rational because it's logic, because it's systematic. You had also is scientific. And so the one thing that I see that's different in buddhism is that you can you can actually discover the mystery by answering all the questions that can be answered.

Discovering all of the things that can be discovery and they would lead you to the and So I I think in anyway that's the essence of doesn't. Buddhism is. I i in that. In the The starting point is that the self... The itself you think you are is in illusion, the little self. And that need to achieve you do with withdraw the discovery of the true stuff. And that's the mystery because you can't understand how that is, but towards that whereas it is as well. Let's start out by looking for ourself and see where we can find.

Is a there isn't there Isn't it there? Well, that's what can be. What's left. And and does so experiential, not just... It's very logical, but the scientific part is that everything is is ultimately experiential. So... Where where it's not just thinking about these things. It's also. Testing testing of us casting the conclusions experience. But the mystery. Right is shouldn't there. Nothing is the way it appears to be. And as much as we can understand reality, is that we're we're all we're all connected and we're all one in way that is not even the way that we can imagine all being on.

That's not right. Rather give it our best effort to try and interpret to exactly what his means and he's still We still haven't let this. That's not. I was wondering in life. If one finds if there being the subject of a bully or once children are like, when a school teacher and finds that they're children on and can be another a kid of someone say i or whatever. So what is like the right action? To give with boys. Because is it... Is it is it right to just turn the other cheek and can tolerate that behavior or is it right to stand up to now Chris Well, I just want to know that like tuesday.

Well, There are occasions when the wisest thing to do this to turn he. And there occasions are the wisest thing to do is to stand up to or... And then there are all kinds of other things that are right at sometimes, but not others. It's not a simple answer to what to do you know, and kind of circumstance. General kind of certain have But when it comes to actual particular situation, then there going to be certain courses of action, that are fire wiser. And more appropriate than others. So the time in circumstance.

Yeah. Could. The question is the problem his challenges. Well going through life being all kinds of different circumstances? How can how how do I know what's the best way to deal with this circumstance this time. And we would love to have a simple answer. We'd love to be able to refer to simple formula that way. When dealing with a bully, always do this, but it's not that simple. And I and the best thing that we have course to our ethical and moral principles and but you need more than that too you need need to bring an element of understanding compassion to the situation as well.

To be certain that, you you can ask go for. People two bad airplanes. Many people gave. Everybody got have some bad. And some people do awful lot that things. And probably the most natural reaction people have is to want to if not destroy to at least attack or harm person but that's bad pain. Have there's not very many situations where that's actually the why thing to do. So you know, your first name incarnation is most likely going to be. A wrong one and that was in that regard. Either sometimes, somebody's harvey somebody else and you're in a position.

To stop them and involves using rhino. That may be the right thing to do that time. But becoming angry at somebody wanting to hurt them. Out of your anger. You know Do gonna help. My hurt person that you attack sound. He'll hurt yourself a whole lot. Maybe all kinds of consequences path afterwards. So you have to you guys think you're, you know, what's But and in the case of I think i most important thing is how can you protect other people against that point or one way she issue pursue. That has.

Is that what? One thing there's no there's no compassion for the or understanding for the bully in that. But also it has all kinds of other terrible consequences we probably our with it. So... But but I would think that the the number one priority and that kind of situation is is what can I do to protect how people it's falling. And then Because that's the most important thing. And then gave we'll go beyond that say off. What else could be done? I don't know if that's Like, what can you do to pretend what?

Like the child say. What what... Like, what what can be do know yeah. Do you have any like idea like right? Well, of course acts Depends so much fun on the situation. And if you take the situation of school your employees. Saying, you know, same I think to the teachers of the principal saying something to a blue parent. In some cases might be helpful an difference. And maybe the fully would receive counsel again become a decent person. But in some cases, it won't call it what happens, so gets called into the office figures out who was it said something.

That much worse. It it's always... It... you know, there's always something many variables. Mh. But the the question is is what can you do this guy be most effective? And if you keep your priorities in place a number priorities is to protect the child you're your concerned about, but also to project protect others, which means somehow you have to think it is any possibility and do subject to a change so pattern not behavior, but least about. But they're aren't he to cancer. You just have to do the best that you can or his much wisdom as she can.

The other thing that's very important. But absolutely everything is don't be attached to the outcome. Reps. But And and is you disappointed by the outcome? Try again and Try carter maybe. But to Our emotional reactions. Can't buy and large to get him the way or is an anything to help us. Hanger we'll get it in the way, but you know the right thing. And if we try something and it does turn out. Frustration anger anything like that. Are they're not going help us to be able to try again and a more effective way.

Anything attempt to make us. Do do something else it's less wise or me discouraged or despair or give about like that. Heard some stories for people you know, either just went out or or straight back, but they they say something shot and they be some shocking that throws the bully off. Mark. And And remember hearing about this man who's in York and Yes. This big... Yeah. I my... He was like buying one raj each person. And person she up he was spun. They can't came and robbed him and everything and he pulled out his law and showed it to him this is my protection or something like that, and the guy just ran off.

And then it was destroying this book I've read that you on me about this this boy who who got who who was coming. He still out me big his came and told him, you know, get sign I mean Jen everything gotten a fuck that. And he had this watch there, but his father had given him he was very very attached too. And and they took that and they took the money and went, and he ran after them and said, Oh, you didn't have all my money, but would you give me back my watch because my father gave me this watch, and it's not a really a very good watch, but it means a lot to me and and he this conversation with the guidance.

And they night don't like. Well, won't take it. They gave back the money too. That that's okay... It tell me story but I i i kinda to experience myself just calling out. I call angel Michael. Why that just met somebody to, You know, it's just like that whole putting them in the different mindset and what they're they're doing. It's kind of, like, waking up somehow. But it's hard to think of that those things. You know, so it depends on part you know, it's michael. I mean they just popped out that.

But I just I'm just thinking, what kind of people are? That's stage you say fully. Had I think it seems to me and what I can remember What I saw at school. Certainly what I see in the adult world. Bullies pick on people that are already somehow disadvantaged. And there are for some people who are always and they're always looking for somebody pick on. But there a whole lot of people that aren't usually bullies, but when they come in my presence are somebody, that is disadvantaged in some particular way.

Maybe. Know what I need? So I don't know what we can learn from that, but it seems this seems to be something important in that. As human beings, social standing is important. Peck orders. And one way to be higher in the peck order is to make sure people are lower. And I think to a certain degree that's going on all the time. So both bullying may just be a really manifestation. Or something that's always going on. It's always a complication too. Established yourself has superior to better than somebody else.

I think to the you know, like children learn example mh. And I I often got to keep that pouring finger. You know, maybe like, a abuse by fraud or something. You know, like i or well a big of brother an older so somebody older a cousin it couldn't be an awkward board whatever. And, you know, they, like, live, you know, precise of little things on stuff. Sometimes. And that's him curled up and barely wet new clock so to make them feel more superior. Than they're pick on by at school... Well, yeah.

Right now. And wouldn't be at all surprising to look at a police family and find out the date a know what? My find that there's a pattern of that timing behavior the whole family way. Or the whole culture. I need their cultures that Well maybe you're saying it's basically a part of possible in the nature. And when you said peck or I thought about words and how they and that seems to be nature. Yeah. And I it it's possible that any one of us would would be come a away in certain situation. That that's it it does.

Although I I think that some of those are hopefully come right beyond that, but you know, I started what I was thinking what I first mentioned that is that there's something some kind of inner program that we come with as a part of our nature and the Birthday too that pre predisposed us to be even this way under certain. Kind of circumstance. And we have a lot of things like that. But part of part of becoming mature responsible adults so we overcome some of these parts of our nature. And part of the becoming moral and spiritual people as to overcome even more of those too.

Know like the patricia have that taken not take satisfaction and sports others. And this is something that is really, really common. Right? And he only overcome a tendency like that. Through having a conscious awareness that you don't want to... You know, it's a almost instinct thing to do. You don't like somebody. You feel really good. I me. Have a problem. And where you see somebody? You know really wealthy with all kinds of things and if something happens to him, well, then you showed out your instinct is kind of well.

Good. Yeah. They considered the plate they had too much. You know? That's right. First and buddhist is filed. I started thinking about that and i thought often. I mean, how it's... So sort of part of the culture did you hear and it's going up. Well, good for them. I hope the that because I knew they were gonna get, you know, and enter reverse it and think well I'm really sorry no matter how bad you are or how better I think you are. I'm I'm really sorry to see me something. You know. That's right.

Choose attitude. Yes. That is That's right. That is send out. And attitude that comes out to wisdom, not. So it has to go against the natural. Sorry. You know, I I think that. The natural tendency, if we see that somebody gives a bully. Is that we see them taking pleasure and what they do. Okay. And so in a sense that they're like somebody is rich or somebody that has... Hey are they they have this way making themselves happy. But then we see that what they're doing to make themselves happy is causing suffering for others.

So in that sense, rich people have become rich off by exploiting how people are doing same thing that employees heard me. Just know. But then a personal level, why does the person have to make themselves happy? Why making you somebody else i? I kind of presently do that. And the natural against instinct it's to say. An evil person should be punished and destroy. But is that accurate? I mean do you what yourself in the mind of about person as that what you find. Or would you find somebody who's already a suffering?

You secure suffering and secure has been themselves. And they trying to do it to compensate with that. Because that... That's the other thing you said we don't. We don't easily arrive a compassion for those that He see that cause us harm that we see that. I current child stab respond with with the judgment and hatred anger. Have to ask the question well. So just everybody really deserve compassion. Or maybe they... It's not a question of whether everybody everybody out there to deserves compassion.

Is really the best thing I can do for myself to find compassion for everybody out there no matter what kind of person I like the second approach because then it doesn't fall on the other person to somehow have some little kernel of goodness and then the makes extent the compassionate. Say that again. Want. Just anything out there? Yeah. Instead... Yeah. That does it have to be the case that everybody out there is somehow deserves your compassion. Does it... you know, because that's a question. Maybe there's some people that don't deserve compassion.

And the only way everybody could deserve compassion, get what same as is everybody has? Like I say, some kernel goodness and that ent them to me trying to find compassion like how further. But turn it the other way around. And is it do i deserve to be able to find compassion for everybody no matter what. Do I deserve Compassion. Am i good up you that mister interesting? Am I could. Am I able to... Is that I should do is it to my benefit? I get to to my. Is is it to my own personal selfish advantage and benefit to find compassion in my heart for everyone.

That's was a question. Oh, that will that being one future? That would be voted cheaper. Yeah. So so this question is a good chat and good tests so I go wait. This is buddy. She does not worth anything anyway? Because if it is, it doesn't matter what kind of person is not there. Right if what's your pardon is that I be able to find compassion for them. The probably be buddha of them. My definition of what a good is. I got compassion called. But, maybe I don't want a people. Maybe I just wanna be...

This much of a buddha so my life easier, but I don't wanna go so far as I didn't have compassion for everybody. That's too much. Yeah. Well, we've spent a lot of opportunities in the past years point she's correct. Push waiters and people now gay and people that see always these people out there to hate, you know, and supposedly leaves goods christian of with or whatever people, because the the always needs to be what people wanted see that certain things are I just totally leave on. Mh. And no that question?

Yeah. Kind all the news media. It it's just a reflection of our way of thinking. Even though the children, little children want the world to eat simple black and white and good evil. We get older and we realize that is gray, but still we wanna make it black and white so that... Because it makes ice easier, when we know who ate. So I got money, and I'm afraid these poor people are gonna take it away from me and then and I can say, you can only take some of my money as taxes if you're willing to...

Use it to kill terrorists overseas, but not if you're gonna give it to these poor people that I'm afraid of. And if you ever remember daniel bully? I can my brother. I can't. I remember what i feel fine. That's rising happened. Feeling powerful wanting to. I used rest all of him. I'll just been because it was two years younger. But will he's got really big and turned into real. Oh my god. What I My time I had this... I have this girlfriend and next door that was, like, a year even and a half younger the i I was and and weeks used to play all the time and And when trying let...

You know, my mother used to deal with us by slapping us he now if we were behaving and wanna time... She slapped me across the base. Mh. A good goodbye know. Because every now and then enjoying and I used to get those sprouts know in time. And when it wasn't like, long out that my mind from my lawn goes technique slapping across the face. And I slapped her across the base. I remembered... You, I felt so terrible after that. Boy she cried my for tomorrow I felt this game an know that just I felt so bad.

You know, i like, hurts important. That's the only even though maybe des and filling up. I mean, I felt really powerful You know that like my like you know Well, see me kids... Just naturally they they said to clicks. And and when the the ones that aren't in the clicks so take notes and all type things. Acceptance. The acceptance is really important. It's as a group that you can deal accepted by the belong term behaving, particularly rates and a strong motivation but behaving that right, even if that involves pulling on many people because that's the basis if sound quick.

Hazardous illegal activities shop. Bunch things like now. Drug alcohol. And not just kids. Think else. In order to belong to a particular room, We try to reflect about a sandwich of that group sometimes without without adequately considering whether those are those are appropriate standards. We want accept times. And even you can't be accepted by a larger society, then I think that I I think if you can't be accepting for Larger society and provides even stronger motivation to find acceptance with him.

Some smaller or hand or it group. So like there's still many in it missing my, like, something things happening redemption and understanding and things that they're talking back this morning and just doing us deeper levels of things from past that that I thought were all freaking link moved way mh. And for some many subtle in doing Buddhist or probably any religion best wisdom. That it's it goes beyond so much more. I mean, like, each of these ten things, stands a lot of trying. Talking about each one, You know, all the subtle and all, just the things like you were talking about this morning.

I a little think that you never thought about. Like the the switch side of that one of learning people saying the for and they. That's something that happened to them is when somebody which you don't like get a lot of things of of about not for. Not wanting them to be happening. I'll they deserve ticket that. You no. Not other side, which we don't up I think from the time with children took this chart girls. One thing that I think is helpful in all of these things. And Sutra on the applications of mindfulness from us over and over again and that sutra.

The Buddha makes ex expectation to see yourself and others the others in yourself. Transcript. How of all of these kinds of behavior that we're talking about? Rely on making a a separation and judgment disregard the things in ourselves while we generate plain drugs. You know, everyone, but Jordan was probably or just know the fact that after the Hockey game a couple of weeks ago and vancouver was right. And it's not like a a right aid. And libya. Let's no trying over overthrow on a government. Yes.

A bunch of people who got too much. Are too excited after that's frustrated because their team lost the talking game. Which of course is one of the most important things right. So that group people. They develop a mob psychology maybe act raise. And individuals do things that they would never... They would otherwise never consider you're doing. Train over cars body function smashing with windows seal things. There's the some of the people who were involved in that have made public apologies and and trying to explain what happened.

Because one of them was halfway, and they probably would ended it up campus Olympic team. He's just graduated from high school and from of a good family, as father's is surgeon. And not the kind of person that you expect to smash windows on, like, cars on fire, but We he did a police clarify. Adam kinda I get it. And so this comes out and, you know, what happens to? This is not a bad person. It's just not somebody who's speaking. Doing these kinds of destructive things and going should been like looking for opportunities to to get in this way.

It's somebody who got caught up what was happening at the moment. And other people were doing it. And then may maybe there were some people who were, you know, like all bad people amongst those. And maybe even those were the ones that would be the first the smash window. What happened in is all these other people. Who would never do it. It start smashing like is goes... Hey, that's what everybody's doing. And it's like a big windows smash part. So everybody smashing with. And then somebody starts to roll over real but.

Oh, me too. And they all lined up his temp guys pushing my police special so also. You know, and all kind stuff. There was a a young woman She was a student university. Everything that found out about her from newspaper article sounds like really, a wonderful. Bright. Person with a a great picture. And she got carried of you. Right? Somebody smashed the window of the stores. Has you reached grabbed a couple of pairs of pants size forty two ways. Nobody in her family where's that size. But hey, you know So you know, and she wrote a long letter, apologizing.

And got president an apologizing and trying to explain people. How somebody else thought of bad person can do. Damn thanks. But the other half the real is that there are all of these kids or even hundreds of thousands of self righteous people. Who are everybody who has us who participate and they have no... There's no compassion. No understand. No sense of g if I was there. I might have gotten caught up and snow. No i see totaling ne, should spend ten or twenty years jail the the the athlete that I mentioned, his father had to close his medical clinic surgeon and the family had to move out of the house because of all of that's all hate harassment visual.

And this is going on. Sorry. You know, who's who's worse. The drunk who got carried to away in smashed windows and cars on fire and they'll little over and things like that. There are all other people who for weeks after are publishing things on the Internet, enhancement details about people headache messages their dresses and phone numbers and careers using other people to call and. Parents or their employers and things like that. Or is there any difference? Probably they all just exactly the same?

Now I would consider all of those that matter group. I consider to them. And there a lot like the school employees that are part of the cli. Right? We're all we're we're all the self righteous science. These are the bad guys. And so we'll all beat up on the bad guys. And add each other on the shoulder how many you? Know they're both doing it from the same. Source. Exactly. Exactly in both cases at kinda. The same thing. And anyone either her K. So easily being a part of the other guy. Oh. I guess that what they would call ignorance.

Themselves. But they don't... They haven't meeting those kids afterwards. Had good reason she do some self information. But the other people, I think that would be the difference attitude people both can't live not really to do in some. That's right. Because certainly, certainly the ones who were involved in the right. Even those that haven't been identified him attack, I'm sure feel a lot of morrison grabbed. But the others are a long way from feeling that i they never feel that. Normally. Don't me get it.

So it's good to Josh. No no matter Do you see Remember that, you know, therefore... But for the race of god line. I think the answer to the original question. Do whatever you can to help whoever you can. Have compassion for everything. Do you find yourself judging setting yourself a bunch someone alex? Never that. If you're on the meeting exactly the kind of state they you condemn others. And also Hanger and Hatred. I'm kinda sure. Who said this. Probably food up but. And even if somebody else said it he probably be said.

But Anger hurts the person who's angry or the punch the person your anchor and the angry up. Hatred. There's more r more on to the behavior to one if you take. So The best thing that you can do for yourself is try not to yourself to that kind of punishment button. And if you feel anchor, let it know. Not in a bad way, but in a way that frees you from release the department service. To whatever degree you can. If you you're might go ahead. I mean, you you have to accept if you handle. If you deny it, bottle it up inside.

It's like it's like passive that just keeps eating. Away. So in whatever good and wholesome way you can let it out let it out. And if you can release the pressure enough, you might actually... Be able to start neutralizing. You got you've got to acknowledge it there. I got you accept it. You got to face the face with it. But you don't need to let it control you. You don't need till let it. Make you suffer. You don't need to let it perpetuate itself or amplify itself for growth? Oh sorry. That's necessary.

They happen so easily. But but they're not in another alert. They don't have to have. And you can move things and the other. Right? And if you cease to be angry, the person that's gonna benefit the most. Your other one is gonna be happier and feel better. And be more capable of taking some sort of really skill and helpful action. They help out a repeat things. Let bring out. Letting me anger out was what they were doing but yeah. Not a good way though. Well, that's the point I'm trying see that have some understanding when so let's wander out sometimes you don't know sometimes it just blows up.

Canada. And then you get into the south judgment. Well, have health text then we can even the more instead I would. Yes. But and that's really important. I, you know, i might listen to someone like Me talk and say, oh, I'm not supposed to feel anger and then they judge himself, but because they do. And that's all. Okay. Yeah. Feel. Won't anymore. So that doesn't something line. And don't judge yourself. Except you can judge yourself this much and say, well, Guess I'm not yet. But you can accept it and say oh.

Look at the heart it's name me. Look at how it makes me feel right now. Look at how it my mind. Look at how waste my time. Look at how it stops my engine. Oh, what. Well That's not about judging myself. It's about... Well, this is like having a bunch. Each section i got, you know, let's get her. Well, that's the. Yeah. No and the, you know, life just gives you. Continue lot. Be so lucky. Just come up one thing. Just when you start to get complacent, think you have everything have. Okay. Well, that was a good discussion.

Let's take a rate stretch.

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